December 31, 2007
7:43 A.M.
I made a concious effort last night to go to sleep ealier. This effort was met with resistance from my body. I lay awake, thinking, for almost two hours thereafter. When I did fall asleep, I dreamt of a particular Vice President where I work. The VPs were rotating responsibilty of coaching youth sports’ teams and it was his turn. He ran out with them very energetically for their first bout. I was there with my ex-wife observing, when violence broke out and I was close to the fight. He became a bear and smashed us all down. It was very uncharacteristic and freightening.
A few hours before I went to sleep, I got an email, the third or fourth correspondence from the same individual via an online dating service. The communications were very relaxed and introspective. This final email was a response to my age. She said that she had one rule, and she didn’t date anyone younger than her oldest son and I was. That’s fine and understanadable. Then she followed it up with “go off and play now dear,” with some other derogatory comments thrown inbetween.
8:43 A.M.
Overheard from a phone conversation: “So I started to get jealous, and I prayed to God, ‘Don’t let me be jealous, because jealously leads to hate,’ and I realized that I have children and I don’t have to sit at home and do nothing.”
Monday, December 31, 2007
Thursday, December 27, 2007
A Bowl of Cherries
Apparently it is a desireable thing for life to be "just a bowl of cherries." Now I like cherries, just fine. But I'm not sure I want my life to be like one.
First of all, there are all those stems and pits to deal with. They've got to be removed and discarded. The stems are cute on the cherries, especially the double stems with two cherries still connected. But in the end, you're just left with a bunch of stems no one wants. What in my life do I want to be like cherry stems?
Then there are those aforementioned pits. You have to be careful when you bite into the juicy flesh of the cherry not to break your tooth on a pit. And it kind of takes away from the total enjoyment of the cherry flesh because you've got that pit to deal with. Again, it's a remnant left to be discarded. What in my life do I want to be like cherry pits? Something that is just in the way and hindering the complete enjoyment of my life, waiting to be culled from the good and tossed into the trash bin next to this thing I call my life?
That leaves us with the edible yummy cherry meat itself. Even this presents a problem. The cherry's juices stain the fingers and lips. Now, cherry juice staining one's lips is a nice thought and kind of sweet, actually. But getting your fingers all red may be more problematic and undesireable. What do I want in my life to be like an unwanted stain upon my fingers that I try to hide from the world?
So, yeah. I'm thinking I'd like my life to be less like a bowl of cherries and more like... like... I dunno... like a joyful experience filled with gratitude and spiritual enlightenment?
Yeah. OK.
Or maybe just like my life, such that it is. After all, it's what I've got right now and there's a lot about it to like and have gratitude for. So, I think I'll go with that answer, Alex... "Life as It Is" for $1000.
First of all, there are all those stems and pits to deal with. They've got to be removed and discarded. The stems are cute on the cherries, especially the double stems with two cherries still connected. But in the end, you're just left with a bunch of stems no one wants. What in my life do I want to be like cherry stems?
Then there are those aforementioned pits. You have to be careful when you bite into the juicy flesh of the cherry not to break your tooth on a pit. And it kind of takes away from the total enjoyment of the cherry flesh because you've got that pit to deal with. Again, it's a remnant left to be discarded. What in my life do I want to be like cherry pits? Something that is just in the way and hindering the complete enjoyment of my life, waiting to be culled from the good and tossed into the trash bin next to this thing I call my life?
That leaves us with the edible yummy cherry meat itself. Even this presents a problem. The cherry's juices stain the fingers and lips. Now, cherry juice staining one's lips is a nice thought and kind of sweet, actually. But getting your fingers all red may be more problematic and undesireable. What do I want in my life to be like an unwanted stain upon my fingers that I try to hide from the world?
So, yeah. I'm thinking I'd like my life to be less like a bowl of cherries and more like... like... I dunno... like a joyful experience filled with gratitude and spiritual enlightenment?
Yeah. OK.
Or maybe just like my life, such that it is. After all, it's what I've got right now and there's a lot about it to like and have gratitude for. So, I think I'll go with that answer, Alex... "Life as It Is" for $1000.
trust in one
Just because a number is large, it isn’t infinite. There are a finite number of melodies available to us through conventional understanding of melodies. I approximate 2,229,025,112,064 total melody combinations made up of four notes or more. This number is entirely liberal and inclusive of all melody combinations, including ones that are only theoretical. The actual number of melodic opportunities is more realistically around 139,314,069,504. So while the perception is one of infinite possibility, it exists only insomuch as that we would be completely unaware of repetition if we were inundated with 139,314,069,504 melodies, over a day or lifetime. In fact, it’s reported that a person with average intelligence and disposition, when queried, can retain only 1,340 unique strings. That means we have a caveat of 103M repeating melodies in the pursuance of infinity.
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