if possbile, we'd like, you know...

Heroic badges
Epic quality: purple.
A new collection.

Trivialize me
Go home, go to bed, go now
Your old ideas suck.

Biblical dreaming
On a Thursday afternoon
Boysenberry junk

Obituary
For your creative nature.
Time to never care.

What follows this scene?
Is it the bus or the crane?
Lively monstering.

Never fade away
When images become real
Expectations met

Goodbye

Graphic designer looking for Asian girlfriend who plays bass…

…or something along those lines.

You may be asking yourself,“Self, is this position right for me?” and if you are, in fact, asking yourself that very question, let me remind you: 1) this isn’t a position and 2) you should probably stop the whole impersonal third-person thing, it’s just weird.

If, by some mercy of god, you have an evolved sense of humor coupled with the competencies necessary for witty banter, I implore you to make yourself known. Prove that intelligent life not only exists, but thrives in the darkened depths of Jacksonville and/or its surrounding counties and sub-communities.

Furthermore, notwithstanding, and in reference to other questions that may arise: Romance, quality-time and quirk all included in the generous benefits package that accompanies this non-position. Chemistry and intangible compatibility required at the outset.

Juno + Underwear

My personality profile

A General Description of How You Interact with Others

You are important. So are other people, especially if they are in trouble. You have a tender heart, but you know how to establish and keep personal boundaries. You are empathetic and compassionate, but you also believe that it's best if people solve their own problems and learn to take care of themselves, if they are able. You are deeply moved by the needs of others, but you know that if you don't take good care of yourself, you'll wind up being of no use to anyone. So yours is a thoughtful compassion. You strive to be fair and sensible, taking care of others while also taking care of yourself. When someone really is in trouble, you like to collaborate with them toward a solution; they do their part, you do yours. You consider carefully, and respond in a sensible way; they do their part, and together you move through the difficulty.  You seldom act impulsively; rather, when a problem arises, you take your time to think through the situation. This contemplative quality usually means that you'll arrive at a diplomatic solution, one that's fair for the other person and also fair to you. It's frequently a win/win situation.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You

For people who are ruled by tender-hearted compassion, your more diplomatic response to problems might seem too cool, too focused on fairness and not filled enough with sympathy and selflessness.  For them, when someone's life is on fire, what is needed is not collaboration but rescue. And the person who experiences their life on fire may resent the time you take to contemplate. "I need you, and I need you NOW! This isn't about fairness, it's about the fire." "All deliberate speed" may seem too deliberate and not fast enough, either to the more compassionate or to people in genuine trouble.  At the other end of the spectrum of compassion, those who believe people should take care of themselves may find even your thoughtful sympathies too soft. They expect people, themselves included, to work their own way out of trouble. They are convinced that the helping hand you lend just fosters dependence and is not good for the development of character, either in you or in the person you assist.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You

Many people, perhaps the majority, will come to appreciate your balance as a compassionate person. The more they get to know you, the more they will admire your thoughtful compassion for others and its compliment in the sensible ways you take good care of yourself.  Those whom you help will appreciate the way you leave them with their dignity by expecting them to collaborate in their own rescue. Those who are more tender-hearted will find in you a balance they lack; when they've run out of energy because they fail to take good care of themselves, you will still have enough compassion left to lift others out of trouble.  Even the tough-hearted, those who believe people should solve their own problems, might come to admire your tenderness which they don't find in themselves. So the people you help will be grateful, and the people who see your balance between self and others will admire you. Certainly, balanced is not bad at all as a way to be known among your friends.

"Lost in the Jungle" or "Is it Wise to Let the Tigers Know You've Forgotten How to Get Home?"

Portia's stomach ached.

Too much caffeine was most likely the culprit. That and the fact that she had trouble with loss. She felt like she had lost so much over the past two years. She didn't know what the hell she was doing and, as long as she'd tried, she couldn't get used to this feeling. Sometimes, she just thought she was totally full of metaphysical bullshit. A way of trying to assuage the gnawing feeling that she had totally fucked up her life and there was no undoing it. Hey, if she was on a "journey" and was here to learn some "lesson" then it must be the right thing, right?

In all truth, she was faced with the same old Lady and the Tiger conundrum. Behind this door was Fear. Behind that door was Everything Else. She stood there, staring at the doors wondering behind which the Tiger of Fear paced hungrily waiting to consume her. Then it occured to her, that perhaps, just waiting and wondering, unable to put her hand on a doorknob and turn, meant she was already in the death grip of Fear. Perhaps in choosing either door, she would be Free.

She didn't know anything, anymore, if she ever did. And all that kept sliding through her head was "what if this is all there is?" She didn't like that thought. It made her sad.

It was funny.

She knew that she was living a weird life that did not feel authentic. When asked if she knew she was loved, she would say, "Yes," but the answer was actually, "well, what do you mean by you love me?" Because she was pretty sure it wasn't what she meant when she said those three words. And so, in reality, she did not feel loved. She felt, well, stupid.

"Stupid is as stupid does." Forrest Gump's Momma used to say. Portia knew she did a pretty fair impression of Stupid these days.

Her head ached.

She bought some incense online that was supposed to help clear her head. Like that was going to help!

Bottomline:
Her stupidity couldn't come to the surface and be recognized until she finished one thing so she was completely in the other. Then the truth would surface in the form of "I love you, baby, but..." As any good writer will tell you, nothing before the "but" counts. And then she would be off on the New Adventures of Being Alone for real.

She hadn't been there in awhile and it looked a lot scarier from where she was today than it had 25 years earlier. Now she knew a lot more of what could go wrong. And now she could spot that exact moment when girls really became women and boys really became men. Adults with all their idiosyncratic crap rather than idealistic kids Becoming. Men and Women have Become and it ain't all rosy by a long shot. There's lots of sticky goo there.

She wished she was still Becoming.

And as soon as she wished it, even as Stupid as she was, she knew it was True. But the feeling was fleeting and hard to hold on to because that's just the way Truth is for those who are not ready...

and if Portia didn't know anything else, if she was honest with herself, which she tried to be but seldom was, she wasn't ready for this Truth.

The question was: How long could she stay in this place of indecision without losing everything. She'd already lost so much but there was more that could be lost. Much more...

Is it wise for Rolex to sponsor an event where the median income of the attendants is six catfish?